What is Alimony?
Divorce can be a lonely and confusing process. No one expects to deal with it or its complications when you initially exchange vows. However, if you go through a divorce, it’s crucial to remember a few things: educate yourself and separate your emotions from the financial aspects. A critical piece to explore if a divorce occurs is what would be your best financial transaction? Whether you have children, you are the breadwinner of the family, you and your partner make about the same amount of income, or you are a stay-at-home moms, divorce will impact your finances and thus, your future.
This article will explore what alimony (or spousal support or maintenance) is, how it typically works, and why it exists.
What is Alimony?
Alimony, also known as maintenance, spousal support, spousal maintenance, or aliment (depending on the US state or country), is money one spouse pays to the other during or after a divorce or legal separation. This payment helps the recipient maintain a similar standard of living. Several factors determine the amount, including the recipient’s age, educational degrees, and the duration of the marriage. If the couple cannot agree on the terms of alimony, a judge usually decides whether it should be paid, how much should be paid, and for how long.
What is the history behind alimony?
The obligation of alimony was first imposed by the Hebrews, Egyptians, and Greeks. It was a practice to deter any feuds that might arise from the relatives of the divorced wife. For instance, the Code of Hammurabi stated that the husband who divorces his wife for no true reason had to give up one piece of silver. Later, Roman law made the husbands give up one piece of gold if they were the guilty spouse. (What a “true reason” was, or what determined “guilt” was surely up to great discussion.)
During the Middle Ages, England created a statute that arose from church teachings that if a divorce were to occur, it would not end the financial obligations that come from a marriage.
Historically, it was much harder for a woman to obtain a divorce than for her husband. For the wife, divorce often led to significant financial cost and almost guaranteed destitution.
How does it typically work?
In modern times, women have been viewed as the recipients of alimony. But increasingly women are becoming the greater breadwinners in their marriages. This is resulting in more women paying alimony to their spouses.
Consider reading, “Breadwinning Women Face an Uphill Battle When Married and When Divorcing.”
But alimony is not embedded into every divorce.
Alimony payments can be paid in one lump sum, while most are periodic, with monthly payments. Lump sum payments cannot be changed, but period payment can end or change if the providing spouse or the receiving spouse can show a necessary change in circumstances.
In today’s world there are three types of alimony:
- Temporary Alimony Support – lasts only till the divorce is finalized.
- Rehabilitative Alimony Support – lasts until the recipient can support themselves.
- Permanent Alimony Support – not always permanent but long-lasting.
State laws dictate how alimony must be awarded, the duration of the payments, and the amount needing to be paid. If a judge becomes involved, the judge will start by looking at whether a spouse needs support, or whether a spouse can pay support. Going into this decision, there are several factors as stated earlier.
Read “Spousal Support, Alimony, and Maintenance. Who Gets It?”
There are no one-size-fits-all rules when it comes to alimony. For instance, some states allow the consideration of abuse or domestic violence in the decision to award alimony. Others do not. Courts in New York use a formula to calculate alimony, other states do not.
In general, if you are the party asking for support, the judge will look at your current income. They will also consider if you supported your spouse’s education. Questions exploring how likely you are to be employed, whether will you need further education or training to receive employment, and how old you are, all come into play.
If you are a Stay-At-Home-Mom, discover more must-knows by reading “How to Prepare for Divorce if You are a Stay-At-Home-Mom.”
These questions and your need for support can feel overwhelming and play upon a woman’s feelings of self-worth. What’s important is to learn what you are entitled to before you start negotiating or giving things away.
At SAS, we encourage every woman dealing with divorce or legal separation to have at least one private meeting with a divorce attorney to learn objectively what her rights and entitlements are in her state. Do not rely on your spouse to tell you “how the divorce will go and what you will get.”
Consult “The 55 Must-Do’s on Your Modern Divorce Checklist”
Conclusion
Most people think that alimony support is given only to women, but the truth is, that both men and women may be entitled to it. However, it remains true that women are likelier to receive it, because they, more than men, have elected to be Stay-at-Home-Moms, or their jobs have them making less money than their spouses.
To be sure, neither spouse likes paying the other spouse alimony. But with today’s world and the way things are evolving, women feel a particular rub with their dissatisfaction about paying alimony. Many women are increasingly in the workforce, gaining traction economically, and starting to make more money than their spouses. But when they return home, they must resume holding the reins as homemakers. Their spouse is not playing the traditional role of raising the children and managing the household. This feels particularly unfair to many women who pay spousal support. Their partner is not a traditional partner pulling their weight and helping with the family unit.
We encourage you to discuss with a lawyer how you might be best protected whether you must pay spousal support or if you are entitled to it. Make sure to further discuss the tax implications. Alimony is too important an issue to be casual about.
NOTES
Natasha just graduated from law school and is sitting for the Bar. With a longstanding interest in health law, she aspires to work for hospitals and nonprofits in continuing to advocate for women’s rights. Her goal is to address the historical issues that continue to prevail in our society by addressing the social determinants of health.
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*SAS continues to support same-sex and nonbinary marriage. In this article, however, we refer to your spouse as husband/he/him.
